going, going, not yet gone
cosmic powers are conspiring against me.
souls of the trees and leaves and cats are sending me hate bombs.
the stars are aligning to create havoc in my system.
songs are sung with rythms of failure.
poems are written with only words of depression.
time ticks in torturingly slow and tiringly fast rythm.
adequately intro-ed, the fact that my life is not in its high time these days has already been put into conclusion. don’t get me wrong, i wasn’t really into self-pity until this moment [save that another moment i talked with a friend]. i tried to fight the sad feeling of sadness. i really did. but the devastating premises that fill the events of my life for the last few weeks have not stopped to haunt my mind until this very time that i finally gave in. hence, i am writing this. to steam off and pour out and empty my mind then finally reach a clean slate for a new start. if i can still have a new start.
for the last three months, i went around losing things. not just things but the most important and valuable ones. some due to utter katangahan, others were pure sheer kamalasan. no matter how i lost those loved valuables, a lost is a lost is a lost. and my heart broke too many a-time.
i had been wishing for good things to counter each loss. until a friend said,
“maybe you already have too much. you just have to celebrate them.”
maybe. maybe i already have. maybe when i’m done retrospecting, i’d see my blessings. maybe when i’m done thinking and evaluating, i’d be better and contented.
You know how to make CONIO naman, diba? Like, conio, right?
by Gerry Avelino and Arik Abu
ex. “Let’s make pasok na to our class!”
“Wait lang! I’m making kain pa!”
“Come on na, we can’t make hintay anymore!”
2. Thou shall make kalat “noh”, “diba” and “eh” in your pangungusap.
ex. “I don’t like to make lakad in the baha nga, no? Eh diba it’s like, so eew, diba?”
“What ba: stop nga being maarte noh?”
“Eh as if you want naman also, diba?”
3. When making describe a whatever, always say “It’s SO pang-uri!”
ex. “It’s so malaki, you know, and so mainit!”
“I know right? So sarap nga, eh!”
“You’re making me inggit naman.. I’ll make bili nga my own burger.”
4. When you are lalaki, make parang punctuation “dude”, ‘tsong” or “pare”
ex. “Dude, ENGANAL is so hirap, pare.”
“I know, tsong, I got bagsak nga in quiz one, eh”
5. Thou shall know you know? I know right!
ex. “My bag is so bigat today, you know”
“I know, right! We have to make dala pa kasi the jumbo Physics book eh!”
6. Make gawa the plural of pangngalans like in English or Spanish.
ex. “I have so many tigyawats, oh!”
7. Like, when you can make kaya, always use like. Like, I know right?
ex. “Like, it’s so init naman!”
“Yah! The aircon, it’s, like sira!”
8. Make yourself feel so galing by translating the last word of your sentence, you know, your pangungusap?
ex. “Kakainis naman in the LRT! How plenty tao, you know, people?”
“It’s so tight nga there, eh, you know, masikip?”
9. Make gamit of plenty abbreviations, you know, daglat?”
ex. “Like, OMG! It’s like traffic sa LRT”
“I know right? It’s so kaka!”
“Kaka?”
“Kakaasar!”
